Stephanie in Japan: Bento Challenge!

The Japanese bento is an art, in my opinion. They’re known by many for their neat arrangements and the time and effort put into making them. Making a bento is pretty meticulous but a pleasure to look at and eat.

*from Google images.

I think perfection is something highly valued in Japanese culture but is understood as something that can never be achieved. There is always something more to learn. Dedicated artists spend their lives working on their crafts whether it’s pottery, flower arranging, kimono painting, etc. Good things take skill attained through time.

I think all people value time, but choosing how to use your time importantly varies from culture to culture. In America, time is money, and when you aren’t making money with your time, you better be using every spare second for relaxing, pursuing hobbies, and spending time with family and friends. I think many cultures would consider it a waste to put so much time into something you’re just going to eat and use for energy. Then again, the reason Japanese bento are known around the world is because of the willingness to put time into them.

Why do many Japanese wives and mothers take hours to prepare beautiful meals for their family? Well, it’s simple really…It’s their way of showing love and affection. Also, I believe it’s that desire for perfection rooted in Japanese culture. In Western countries, love is show through hugs, kisses, and “I love yous.” In Asian countries, it’s shown through hard work for each other. Men work long hours for their family. Women spend time cooking and cleaning for their family. I’m not saying everyone is like this, but it is a traditional standard for sure.

Lately I’ve been thinking about my place in Japan. I am American. I am proud of my culture and value my beliefs. However, I also am a resident of Japan. I am living a Japanese lifestyle and have a Japanese boyfriend. Over two years have passed since we’ve been together, and with my time on JET coming to an end next year, there will be some drastic changes in my life, the main two being finding a new job and moving. The timing just works out to move in together, a thought that frightens and excites me. Of course I’m so excited to move in with the man I love and have my first real place that I get to choose myself, but I worry that I can’t live up to the Japanese standards of being a good “housewife.” I want to meet his expectations.

Of course my boyfriend understands that I am American and a working woman. He reassures me that anything I prepare for him will be fine, even if it’s the American way of throwing a sandwich, chips, and a piece of fruit in a bag and calling it finished. Poor guy has never cooked a thing in his life and is incapable of preparing a lunch for himself, but that’s normal here. On days woman can provided a meal for their husband or kids, they go to the convenience store and buy a premade bento or eat out. However, there is no love in that LOL!

I have begun thinking about my future life and how I’d like to balance the American and Japanese sides of me. I like cooking. I like art. So I thought I would start trying to make Japanese-style bento for myself as a way to prepare and practice for living with my boyfriend. Here’s what I’ve found so far…

First, omg, it DOES take sooo much time! I’ve come to the realization after my experimentation thus far that working full-time and making a bento AND dinner from scratch is just too much for me. During my first full week of trying to make a homemade bento and dinner for myself every day, I wasn’t eating dinner until 10pm! I also had no time to relax. It was go home, exercise, shower, do chores, make bento, cook dinner, eat, and sleep. I was spending like 2-3 hours on cooking. This is what I decided:

I can make a home bento from scratch if I plan to do a simple dinner like take out, premade meals, or 10 minute meals OR I can substitute parts of my bento with premade or simple things and make a dinner from scratch. I think a lot of Japanese woman buy frozen sides and such to put in their bento. Also, most Japanese households have rice ready-to-go in the rice cooker at all times which saves time. I’m slowly figuring out how to balance the time put in to cooking.

Another thing I I’ve found so far though this experience is that putting creativity in your lunches is fun, and I am looking forward to eating at work so much more every day. Bento are fun to eat. I can feel the love I’m giving myself hehehe!

So let’s get down to it…what do my bento look like?! Well, I have a long way to go. I went to the dollar store and got a lot of materials for making bento cute and organized. That part is going well, I think. My main issue, however, is that I’m not actually making Japanese food because it’s not what I want to eat every day. Work lunches are my best way to control my portions and eat healthy, so I pack lots of fruits and vegetables and keep it pretty light.

Cooking Japanese food is difficult for me. It’s something I’m not used to, and I feel like there isn’t much room for improvisation like there is with American food where you can just through whatever you have in the fridge into pastas, sandwiches or omelets. That’s just my opinion. For example, there is a set way Japanese karaage (fried chicken) should look and taste which is a common bento item. The same goes for dashimaki tamago (Japanese omelet) and so on. These are things that any Japanese woman can make I feel because they grew up around it, but to me even simple miso soup or rice balls make me uneasy. I know it’s something I really need to practice. For now, I’m making American-style Japanese bento, but I plan to experiment with cooking Japanese food little by little. Wish me luck!

Here are some bento I’ve made so far…